Thursday, August 31, 2017

Select All. DELETE.

This morning didn't start out the way I had hoped. My daughter Lily (10), woke up on the wrong side of the bed. She didn't t have her school uniform ready, she wanted to pack her own lunch, but I had already done it, she couldn't find her choir sheet music and her sass and attitude were at an all time high.

I gave her a few minutes to gather herself as told her to meet me downstairs when she had a better attitude. I had her breakfast cereal in a bowl. And had laid out her hairbrush and inhaler next to where she likes to sit. I said, "Lily, I love you, but whatever that was upstairs, that isn't going to happen again."

Lily was quiet for a few more minutes and as my back was turned making coffee, she says, "Mom, I am sorry. Mornings are hard for me. I sometimes get overwhelmed thinking of everything I need to do today and I panic."  The rude mom in me thought, you are 10! What do you have to worry about?!

The calm mom in me responded, "I get it. These first few days for school are hard and a time of adjustment. I understand feeling overwhelmed, but even when you feel that way, you need to speak kind words to me. I am your mom. We are a team. I am here to help you and you are here to help me. When you yell, disobey and disregard what I have to say, that says that you don't care and that you think doing it your way is more important than working together as a team. When you get home from school today, I need a better attitude from you and your helpful servant heart to be showing. "

Lily smiled, leaned in for hug when I approached her and said, "I can do that. Sorry mom."

What?! That was so easy! Normally, if Lily and I butt heads, she fights and argues and defends and justifies until we are both blue in the face. I was astounded. Could it possibly be true that when I respond with kind words during her time of panic,  that she will eventually calm down, hear what I have to say, and realize that her sass and attitude will not help either of us?

So this morning, I select all and delete. I declare a do over.  I will be praying for my spirited little lady while she is at school today and will tackle this parenting thing all over again when that 430 bus arrives home.

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