Thursday, November 21, 2019
Apparently, even after all these years, I am still surprising myself. One would think that at 44, I would have figured out who I am and how I operate. One would be wrong. I am a faulty, messy, distracted, fair weathered individual. I can be on it one day and completely scattered the next.
Actions speak louder than words. And those actions sometimes have severe consequences. Severe enough consequences that can ruin relationships, change the course of a life and even cause a complete breakdown of person's ideology.
I find it disconcerting that I am always able to detect, point out and even call out poor behavior and decisions in someone else's life before I am willing to admit, confess and conquer those same behaviors and decisions in my own life. I call out someone else's sin before I am willing to come face to face with my own. Plank and speck. I even justify my judgement and need to convict others of their sin, forgetting that I can not be nor ever will be the ultimate con victor, the Holy Spirit. Taking on that job isn't one that I ever wish to have, especially when dealing with my hot mess self each and every day.
Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye. Matthew 7:3-5
Those planks tend to be messy, huge, and life stalling. The existence and presence of so many planks can often blind and deter me from even attempting to take a step forward. Usually because I have been focusing on fixing everyone else. And when I pause, on days like today, and acknowledge that some serious personal housekeeping needs to be tended to, a knee is bent, a request for forgiveness is made, thanksgiving and praise is given to a loving Savior and an acknowledgement occurs of the grace and love that is bestowed to me each and every day.
When I pick up the pieces that have been mended not by own hand, a step forward is then possible. Not only possible but commanded. That first step is to love others, to serve others, to pour into the lives of other people.
Each time this happens, I remember what I was taught as a child. Be the one that addresses the planks, not the puller of specks.
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