Friday, July 6, 2018

What I See While We Wait- Josh's 16 Week Update

I spend a lot of time in waiting rooms. Sometimes they are full, mostly very empty. The very empty ones provide time for me to read, respond to emails and text messages and rest. Josh has been struggling for 16 weeks. I wish that I could report to you that he is feeling better. He is not. He still is unable to work or drive and spends most days moving from the couch to the dining room for VRT exercises then back to bed to settle his weary head.  

This week we went to the doctor 3 times. Mostly for labs, ultrasounds and scans, and then today to see a kidney specialist.  Last week, a very thorough doctor discovered an additional medical problem.  High liver and kidney enzymes and wanted to make sure that nothing in addition to VN was plaguing Josh.  His liver seems to be functioning well now, but his kidney's are still on fritz. The kidney doctor believes that this will resolve itself over time, yet one additional scan has been ordered for the 17th, when they will look at blood flow to and from the kidney's. He wonders if possibly only one kidney is functioning at this time.  The scan from the other day revealed only an old injury to his spleen that is completely healed and has calcified, so it doesn't reveal any new information. 

His next three appointments are scheduled at the U of M for the 19th and 20th (additional testing) and then with the head of neurology on the 24th.  Thank you for your continued prayers and support. For helping us fix things in and around our home. For feeding us and for entertaining our children. As soon as we have any additional information about Josh's condition, I will be sure to share it. 

Today I watched a lovely little girl who just turned one play in the clinic lobby with her dad. Her name was Valerie.  She smiled at me and waved as they walked by. I told her that her flower sundress was beautiful and that she is such a good little girl at the doctors office.  She took out her nuk and blew me kiss. Made my day. Tears pricked the corners of my eyes because of sweet Valerie.

I never find myself bored in the waiting rooms.  The book I was reading today talked about listening to words people use and really focusing on what they actually mean.  Spoken word is different than the written word, but one can evaluate both.   I heard a noise above me and my eyes darted up.  The ceiling at 212 Medical Center is a sight to behold.  Odd ball lighting, lots of speakers and sprinklers, and the occasional recessed light that all appear to be placed without rhyme or reason.  But in the chaos, there is beauty to be found there. Maybe it is just geometric nonsense.

But in the shadows is where I found comfort today. A beautiful morning in Carver County, we were able to enjoy the breeze and the sunshine and the temperature is just right at 82 degrees. I sat and waited for Josh as additional appointments and tests were scheduled.  I hummed a few bars of Great is They Faithfulness.  Morning by Morning New Mercies I See. All I have needed, your hand has provided. Great is Thy Faithfulness, Lord onto Thee.

God has watched over us, protected us, guided us and continues to lead us during this trial. This is temporary. Only the Lord is Eternal. Knowing this brings comfort and peace. When the days are long and seem to just be the same day in and day out, the Lord has been there the entire time.  Never leaving us. Never forsaking us.  And that is why I will continue to sing.

Psalm 63:7
Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

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